Yo Mama So Fat

Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last christmas and its still printing

Yo mamma so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of George Washington’s nose.

Yo mama so fat she’s got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book.

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.


Yo mama is so fat, she got arrested at the airport for ten pounds of crack

Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

Yo mama so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her

Yo mama so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.

Yo mama so fat her beeper went off and people thought she was backing up.

Fail Black Friday

Fail Owned Babysitter

Fail motorcycle ride

Six riders one helmet, sweet.....

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes

Check out favorite quotes about Thanksgiving from comedians like Jon Stewart, Jim Gaffigan, Johnny Carson and more.
Jon Stewart: "I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land."
Jim Gaffigan: "Thanksgiving. It's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. 'Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?' 'But we do that every day!' 'Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?'"

Stephen Colbert: "Thanksgiving is a magical time of year when families across the country join together to raise America's obesity statistics. Personally, I love Thanksgiving traditions: watching football, making pumpkin pie, and saying the magic phrase that sends your aunt storming out of the dining room to sit in her car."

Kevin James: "Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants."

Funny Redneck Jokes

Redneck Joke 01
You might be a redneck if a full tank of gas doubles the value of your truck.

Redneck Joke 02
You might be a redneck if a woman says she’s game, so you shoot her.

Redneck Joke 03
You might be a redneck if all of the light switches in your house are wired to turn on the light on the front porch.

Redneck Joke 04
You might be a redneck if all of your favorite shirts came with a two-pack purchase of cigarettes.

Redneck Joke 05
You might be a redneck if all you want for Christmas is deer pee.

Redneck Joke 06
You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.

Redneck Joke 07
You might be a redneck if any of your children were conceived under a stop light.

Redneck Joke 08
You might be a redneck if any of your hobbies require dogs and a lantern.

Redneck Joke 09
You might be a redneck if any of your honeymoon plans involve a deer camp.

Redneck Joke 10
You might be a redneck if anyone in your family has ever purchased peroxide in a gallon container.