Friday

Blonde Selling a Car

ditzyblonde-funnyA blonde was trying to sell her old car but wasn't having any luck because the car had 250,000 miles on it.
      One day, she mentioned this to a friend. Her friend told her, "There is a way to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."
      "That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "I've just gotta sell it."
      "Okay," said the friend. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the odometer in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell it."
      The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, her friend asked her, "Well, did you sell your car?"
      "No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!"

Wednesday

Blonde and The Cheating Boyfriend

hot-bikini-pics5 A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes about and buys a gun.

She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door, she finds him in the arms of a redhead.

Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief.

She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it." The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"

Monday

You Are So Poor Jokes

poorbumhomeless
You are so poor you eat cereal with forks to save milk!

You are so poor your face is on the cover of a food stamp!

You are so poor when I walked in your front door a mouse tripped me and a cockroach stole my wallet!

You are so poor I walked in your house and asked to use the
bathroom and you told me to pick a corner!

You are so poor that you use dental floss as toilet paper!

You're so poor that yesterday I saw your mother moving a trashcan from one street to another. I asked what was she doing and she said, ''I am moving it's too noisy over there!